Boy, do I wish! I find that the more I take a dip in this motherhood pool, the more I encounter confrontation. Why are we as women so defensive of our choices? Or a better question is, why are we so judgmental of other women’s choices? And better yet, judgmental of things that other women don’t get a choice of.
My favorite is the vaginal birth brigade. I get it. That is the way nature intended you to bring your child into the world. But fertility treatments, adoption, and surrogates are all widely accepted. Why do c-sections have to be the epitome of “unnatural” procedures? Then there are those of us who didn’t get a choice at all. Even if I had, why is that so evil? How does it affect your life exactly?
I think that might be the best question to ask in situations when you want to judge others. How does their decision affect my day-to-day life? Chances are it doesn’t. My wearing maternity jeans for the rest of my life will have no affect on you. Feeding my son formula will have no affect on you. Neither will when I decide to start him on solids, how I dress him, or the fact that I work and my husband is a SAHD. You can go the rest of your life never knowing any of these things and still be happy.
So if you are happy and content with how you do things, and they work with your family, why waste time looking down on others? Being a parent is hard-work, and you are challenged everyday to be a better person. So when we are feeling inadequate it is easy to point out the faults of others. It could be our significant others or a stranger you see in public nursing their 3 year-old.
It is important for us moms (dads too) to give ourselves a break. Is you baby happy and healthy? Then just enjoy the ride, because you already have a wonderful gift to cherish. Don’t waste time dwelling on the bad. Embrace the positive!
I know, I sound sappy but it’s true. Did you struggle getting pregnant? Was your pregnancy challenging for you and your child? Look at the miracle you were given and hold it tight. Life flies by to fast to take your eyes off the road.