My husband and I were talking yesterday and I was telling him how my outlook on tasks, goals, and projects has changed since becoming a mother. What I realized is that because of the permanence of becoming a parent, and more specifically going through pregnancy, I see now how important it is to follow through.
As a woman, having a child is not just a change in your outward lifestyle, often it is a change in how your body looks, feels, and runs. Your entire mentality must change, almost overnight once you realize you are in charge of growing a human being. And as much as you might try to pull away from the responsibility, there is no going back. You are going to have to see this pregnancy, and your subsequent parenthood, to the finish line. In reality, that is the rest of your life. There is no pushing it aside. There is no quitting. There is no it can wait until x, y, or z. It is immediate and ever-progressing.
As some of you know, I have gone back to school. I wanted to start back on this path last fall but pregnancy took me down pretty hard the first trimester, and I’m glad I didn’t attempt it. I’m also glad that I had the experience of having a child to help me mature. I feel like I have floated along for a while without a real direction, afraid of failure and therefore, giving up before I had a chance to. Something both myself and my husband need to work on is starting something AND finishing it. We both agreed that we are great at the idea and starting part of a project, like say cleaning out our office, but the actual work and finishing part? Not so much.
I know that my choice to do some of these things now – back to school, possible career change – seems a bit late in the game. But I think that it is possible that I needed these life experiences to help me with my others. Maybe I needed something in my life that I couldn’t just back out of or walk away from to make me see that it will take follow through to achieve my goals, not just a grand idea or a stroke of luck. I will always be grateful to my son for teaching me this lesson. Even before he is born.
This is just one of the many ways I have changed since becoming a mother. Sometimes I stop and reflect on how I’ve changed in other ways…
- I’m more patient (well, a little at least)
- I’m more family-oriented
- I’m less impetuous and more deliberate
- I’m more thoughtful
- I’m more determined
- I care less what people think
- I’m more emotional
- I’m more hopeful
- I’m more grateful
- I’m more happy and appreciative
- I’m more introspective
These are just a few of the ways that I’ve noticed changes in my thoughts and feelings about life. How have you changed since becoming a parent? Or, if you aren’t a parent yet, have their been experiences in your life that have changed your outlook or helped you mature?