Leaving on a Jet Plane

Tomorrow I fly off to North Carolina to celebrate/host the bridal shower and bachelorette part of one of my best girls, Miss Liz Louise. I cannot wait to party and celebrate with her.

I haven’t flown since my little was born and what’s more, I haven’t left him for more than two nights. That was a road trip up to the Nor Cal coast. This is flying to the other side of the country. I’m anxious but excited. I know that my husband is more than capable, but that doesn’t mean I don’t worry. What if he gets sick? What if he goes through a sleep regression or growth spurt? What if he forgets about me? I know the last one is completely irrational but, I’m a mom and a worrier: it’s a recipe for disaster.

I know that I am going to have fun and enjoy the break. I know I need the time off from work. I can feel the burn out coming. I could use the change of scenery and sometime to just be me; not an employee, a wife, or a mom. I will always be those things, but it will be nice to just be one of the girls for a few days, not just hours.

Wish me safe travels and maybe if you’re lucky, I’ll blog from the road!

 

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At my bachelorette, what seems like years ago (it was)…aren’t we cute?!

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Here Comes 31!

31

Does it count as a “no make up selfie” if that’s the norm for me??

 

If 30 doesn’t make you officially old, 31 has to, right?!

Another year in the books and I am pleased to say that 30 wasn’t that bad. Good job, got into grad school, and we didn’t move to a new place, so that’s a bonus. I’ve reconnected with old friends and made some new ones.

I look back on the things I’ve learned and how I’ve grown. Patience, understanding different viewpoints, maturity, power, and self-awareness. Things are areas that I have improved upon, and will continue to work on¬†everyday.

I am lucky to have my husband with me through everything. He is strong, yet sensitive. Most importantly, he’s my partner. We really do complement each other well.

As with so much of the joy in my life these days, I owe so many smiles to my son. For a little over two years, he has really shown me what life is all about. ¬†Growing a person, raising a person, being someone’s rock, their strength, their world…nothing else compares to that. As long as I get to keep doing this mommy thing, I know I’ll be alright with getting older.

Default Parent

It’s always mom. No matter how far we think we have come as a society or in our relationships, moms are always the default parent. We have all the answers. All the cures. We have whatever it takes to stop the tears. At least that seems to be what dads believe. Because we were the sole provider and home for nine months, everything that happens once they leave our bodies is still our domain too. It doesn’t matter if we make more or are the only provider. We women are always the default parent.

Or maybe it’s just me having this experience. Maybe I’m the only one feeling so alone sometimes and that I have to sacrifice twice as much. I wonder if there are any other mommies are feeling this way?

I’ve been up since 4 a.m. I’ve worked a super busy day and nursed a baby (and pumped at work) in between it all. Yet, it’s 11 p.m. and I’m the one sitting on the couch all alone waiting for the baby to go to sleep. And when he wakes up as soon as i put him in his crib and we begin our nightly dance of sleep/wake, I’m the one who gets to be the default parent all over again tomorrow…